Bride to be

Have you ever looked around at the people around you and been jealous at the fact that they know exactly what they want and can do it as they please? Thats what the preliminary weeks of planning my own wedding have done to me.

I remember imagining this day, since I was too small to reach the tops of the counters in the kitchen. I remember sitting in my room throughout my teen years wondering how the day would turn out.. trying to imagine what my dress would look like, or the flowers, or the outdoor ceremony I was so sure I'd have.

*Throw that piece of paper away*

My reality is that even though not many decisions have been made about said day... I'm not happy nor animated at all with the decisions that have.

I remember being truly touched when I got engaged, how special that perfect moment was for me. I remember getting into bed that first night and feeling so lucky that something so amazing had happened to me. How beautiful the thought was that someone loves me so much that they can't imagine the rest of their lives without me by their side.

Thats the thought that is helping me cope with the wedding.

After all, everything aside.. the only thing that matters to me is that we love each other, that we want to be together. Which I know we do.

The wedding is JUST a party. One day in our lives. Truth be told I can see already why people elope. It removes 98% of the stress involved with planning this ever so 'important' day.

Maybe the fact that I've been an invalid for the past few days has dampened my spirits, I broke a couple of toes five days ago and I'm still limping around. I'm hoping I'll be able to wear a shoe for my engagement party on Saturday (4 days away). But, they say that when bad things happen during the wedding planning process/on the wedding day it means good luck. If these preliminary stages are in any way a peek into how intolerable this process is going to be then I'd say we are in store for the best marriage in the universe! lol

Joking aside. I didnt really anticipate this being such a drag. I normally love planning events but there are so many obstacles regarding this one that I seem to be losing steam before any is necessary. Although according to my research I'm not the only Bride-to-be that felt this way so I'm sure eventually things will evolve into something I can enjoy.

Till then, I bid you a brief farewell. I will definitely try to be more upbeat with my posts in the future.. I just needed to vent a little. Share my lack of enthusiasm. lol

*cheers*